1)            Only two things make the marriage work. I have listened to motivational speakers who believe they are qualified marriage counsellors. Any counsel that fails to take divine rhema, hook, line and sinker and be metaphorically drowned in God’s word, is merely using God’s word without wisdom. You cannot broach on an existential phenomenality while veering off the tandem of the true kennel of the matter. Glamourizing human philosophical perspective is an attempt to exalt mental wisdom above the law of Divinity.

                What we fail to acknowledge simply is that these lofty ideals could be fashions of Satanism, just to throw us off the true course of marital bliss. If it is not strictly in conformity with the Scriptures and you fail or refuse to jettison it, you may end up entangled in irredeemable confusion. When you take the dose of Divine prescription, it is unwise and evil to add your own ‘supplementary vitamin’ for more effectiveness. God’s dosage is eternally the accurate solution.

Husband love, wife submit, for a successful marriage.

                On God’s prescribed solution to marital bliss hang other resultant facts. These facts emanate from God’s divine perception. Chasing after those resultant production is merely spending your hard earned resources on symptomatic issues, leaving the fatal ones to increase in evil strength. Symptoms are mere smokescreens intended to keep you far, far away from the true cause of insalubrity. Strict adherence to scriptural wisdom is what one should stick to, stubbornly, if you would. Of course, it is quite evident that their conjugal prescriptions tend to be sourced from God’s protocol, but their counselling are mainly on the trivialities of symptomatic issues like: make sure you kiss everyday; hold hands very often; know when to ask questions; you must sleep together on the same bed; do not keep secrets; wait for one another at meals; be frank with one another et cetera. What is wrong with these exhortations? Nothing. But they fail to address the two indubitable factors of marriage success.

                It says to the man, the head of the family, in Ephesians 5:25, “Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave himself for it;” but before this couch, Divine command to the woman, the wife, reads in Ephesians 5:22-24, “Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord. 23) For the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church: and he is the saviour of the body. 24) Therefore as the church is subject unto Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in every thing.” To the same wife is Colossians 3:18 “Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as it is fit in the Lord.” The next verse of Colossians 3:19 says, “Husbands, love your wives, and be not bitter against them.” Upon these two Pauline inspired scriptures stand the attainment of hymeneal success.

No love or submission leads to marital failure.

                Many marriage counsellors will insist on working on things like: personal ego, tribal difference, social status, blood group, sickle cell anaemic partnership, and some other problems, as the things we should look out for in order not to commit oneself to a marriage that will fail. Male ego prepotency is very likelihood. No wife will love to serve under an imperious husband. Male egoistic proclivity is definitely unhealthy for a successful marriage. A pastor friend of mine, Sarafa Olajide, will tell you point blank that there are some towns even in the land of Yoruba of Nigeria that should not think of getting married simply because of traditional hatred, which happens to be his own personal experience, when he, an Egba indigene, had his first marriage terminated all because, “We Ekiti people cannot give you our daughter,” on the very day of the wedding! Since then Pastor Olajide will not allow anyone to marry from a place where the people tend to be antagonistic to those of some other people of different dialect.

                Social status ranges from birth, educational, financial and influential backgrounds. Gregariously, yes, these things could be impediments. I understand the insufferable pangs of crises sickle cell anaemic patients go through periodically, but why should blood group difference come between intending couples? Marriage counsellors will spend lots of days working intending couples through idiosyncratic proclivities that will mar the marriage. This I do, honestly, agree with. The truth we always fail to understand is that, no matter how idiosyncratically warped an individual is, those two indubitable factors of Colossians 3: 18-19 will take care of all evil darts of Satanism shot at the conjugal relationship. What am I trying to get across here?

                Spiritual acquittal and discharge takes place only when one is born again. To be born again, say, with all your heart, this simple prayer:

“Dear heavenly Father, I come to You now in the name of Jesus Christ. I believe in my heart that Jesus is the Son of God. I believe that Jesus died on the cross for my sin. I believe that You raised Him from the dead. I confess with my mouth that Jesus is Lord and I receive Him now as my Lord and my Saviour. I give God all the glory. Amen!”      

(…to be continued…)

Read part 2 here

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