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Conjugal Gist (4)



 (…continued from part three…)

*4*        Many times the wife thinks she can mould her husband to assume the shape of her dreams. How wrong can many women be? As a wife, the woman should know that she is blessed with two lords: her husband and, of course, Jesus. He is the perfect personification of what a husband should be. Did the wife create the man? Does she know the thoughts of his mind? 1Corinthians 11:8-10, For the man is not of the woman; but the woman of the man. 9) Neither was the man created for the woman; but the woman for the man. 10) For this cause ought the woman to have power on her head because of the angels.



The head of the family is the husband. The preposition ‘of’ in verse 9 is ek (ek) (or ex ex) ‘1. from (the point whence action or motion proceeds) 2. out (of place, time, or cause).’ The word ‘power’ is the Greek exousia (ex-ou-see’-ah) ‘1. Privilege 2. (subjectively) force, capacity, competency, freedom 3. (objectively) mastery (concretely, magistrate, superhuman, potentate, token of control), delegated influence.’ The wife only wields ‘a delegated authority,’ given to her by her husband. This is attested to by 1Corinthians 11:3, “But I would have you know, that the head of every man is Christ; and the head of the woman is the man; and the head of Christ is God;” and the key word, ‘head’ is kephalē (kef-al-ay’) ‘from the primary word κάπτω kaptō (in the sense of seizing); the head (as the part most readily taken hold of), literally or figuratively; metaphorically (source or origin).’ The husband is the primary source of the wife, scripturally speaking.


A “Deeper Life Christian Church” member friend of mine teaches that the husband is like the President, and the wife actually, is the Prime Minister (of a parliamentary system of government) in the home. The husband, according to my friend’s understanding, is only the presidential figure head in the family. The wife is the executive power wielding Prime Minister! How can anybody teach this in the scriptural face of 1Corinthians 11:8-10? It is, whether anyone likes it or not, a man’s world, and this is not the thinking of chauvinism. Let the man run the family. Assist him spiritually. Jesus is more than ready to help you Mrs. Adam. This is a reason why I have always asseverated that marriage is designed only for Christians. Amen.


The woman cannot take the role of the man, in the marriage. It is tantamount to a coup d’état. It takes the family back to the evil machination of satanic intrusion. Jesus, as we all know, is a man. HIS human representation in that family is the husband. It says, “submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord.”  The adverb ‘as’ is: hos (hoce) meaning: ‘which how, i.e. in that manner (very variously used, as follows).’ As the Church submits, spiritually, to Christ, so is she to submit to her own husband’s decisions.

love 2

I am yet to come across a man who will raise the whip to serve some painful punitive lashes upon himself for doing a wrong thing. I, therefore, find it difficult to understand why the husband will deem it fit to hit his wife, no matter how mildly soft the blow is delivered. You cannot even put her under any harsh verbal or mental attack. Help her maintain a psychological appositeness. Jesus, your archetype, is constantly doing everything possible to protect and to comfort us. “I will not leave you comfortless: I will come to you” [John 14:18]. ‘Comfortless’ is  orphanos (or-fan-os’) ‘bereaved (“orphan”), that is, parentless.’

A dereliction of duty, therefore, is what it amounts to when the husband refuses or decides not to love his wife. The husband must stand in the stead of Jesus, who was coming to the garden every cool of the evening, in His preincarnate manifestation as the LORD God, presiding over the Church services in Eden. The scripture teaches: “For where two or three are gathered together in my name, there am I in the midst of them” [Matthew 18:20]. Marriage constituted the first Church on earth. As long as the pristine Church continued to live by the dictates of her Lord and Head everything went on well.


You can be part of the conjugal gist by being born again. Say this prayer from your heart, believing every word. Dear heavenly Father, I come to You now in the name of Jesus Christ. I believe in my heart that Jesus is the Son of God. I believe in my heart that Jesus died for my sins and You raised Him from the dead. I confess with my mouth that Jesus is Lord, and I receive Him as my Lord and my Saviour. I give God all the glory, Amen. (…to be continued…)

Read the previous 3rd part here

Read the next part five here

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My name is H.O. Ojewale. I was born in 17th March, 1955, in the then Gold Coast, now Ghana, Greater Accra. My parents are Nigerians. I am married with three wonderful children.


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