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Do You Have To Marry To Prove A Point? (2)


head of family
Man is the head of the wife.

“…and the head of the woman is the man…” (1Corinthians 11:3)

(…continues from part 1…)

2)            Free moral agency activation can ruin the marriage on the part of the spouse. That she needs someone beside her at this critical time of her life cannot give you an excuse for marriage. “Maybe,” you believe, “when we marry, it will make her happy, and consequently save her from this critical situation.” You do not have to marry him or her to prove a caring point. Once you enter into this thing called marriage, it demands total commitment. In another scenario: he has lost his wife. You pity his present predicament and you believe that marrying him will solve his loneliness; but it can prove to be a disastrous venture. After a couple of months, the reason for your pity is taken care of, but the true personality of your conjugal business begins to manifest. Your spouse has been hiding behind the protruding theatrics of moral rectitude. Then you begin to hear things like, “Well, this is the real me. Please, learn to deal with it.”

                We have the same philosophy of life does not mean that you have conjugal compatibility. It is not about sharing the same views on life, intellectualism, religion or aesthetic tastes. It is strictly of Jesus Christ, ergo, has nothing to do with mundane delicacies. How did the first pristine couple meet? It is in this manner: God created Adam the male; God, looking at the Adamic sinless perfection, saw that he must not be different from the One he prefigured – Christ must have a wife. He put Adam to sleep and took his rib, with which He created the Woman.

Adam had everything to succeed

Adam was created with all he needed to succeed as the lord of the earth

                Before the creation of Adam the female, God had instructed him on how to be in charge of the world; had given him full authority and endowed him with the intellectualism needed to be the lord of the terra firma. As Adam slept, God went away from him to build him a help meet for Adam, the lord of the earth. Would God have brought the Woman, like the bride’s Father would, and not brief His daughter, who was about to be wedded to the good man and the lord of the earth, on how to be the good Woman of Adam? God, the Father of Adam, by creation, is also his Father-in-law. They had been briefed to make the union work, prosper and last. Your marriage to anyone must come from the direction of the same God who instituted marriage. How can God instruct your choice of wife? Study the Bible, where He still talks to mankind.

                It is egregious stupidity to marry strictly for money. Marriage is never for sale. It will be an act of Satanism to sell your marital commitment for money. True love is not for sale. You cannot surrender your obedience to the husband in exchange for dollars – it smells of spiritual disgust. It is nothing short of an insult to God’s institution. You believe the politician needs a woman like you to help him to win the election, so, marriage to him is the best option. You are wrong. As long as marriage contact does not preach and lift up the name of Jesus, it is an exercise in futility. Marriage is strictly God’s business; its orientation finds its roots in the Word of God.

fall of humanity

Disobedience: root of Adam’s fall.

                “We are business partners; marriage has, for centuries, kept global businesses between great families.” Forced conjugations tend to receive unconducive strictness of coercion to prolong its unpalatable life of extension. How do they cope with life? Illicit relationships of sex and use of drugs become the order of prevalence. Abnormality reshapes their normalcy; look at each one of them: just hanging there so pitifully. They are rich, unbelievably rich, but not happy in marriage.

                You can be childhood friends; does that translate into successful marriage? Not necessarily so, I believe. If Jesus, the Author of marriage is not the focal point of attraction, phew, you can only live through the marriage swimming in the odious pool of pretence. We hardly remember that two things bring soteriological reality into actuation: the agapē of Jehovah and the heart of submission, on the part of the believing born again Christian. Let the husband and the wife ponder seriously on this facticity. Marriage must be running on a Jesus-inside application. Do not tell me, “Well, at age thirty, I’m old enough to give marriage a shot.” You cannot marry to prove any mundane point.

Be redeemed, restored and reborn; get born again.

                Getting born again is a conscious effort on the part of an individual. Get born again. Say this sinner’s prayer.

“Dear heavenly Father, I come to You now in the name of Jesus Christ. I believe in my heart that Jesus is the Son of God. I believe that Jesus died on the cross for my sin. I believe that You raised Him from the dead. I confess with my mouth that Jesus is Lord and I receive Him now as my Lord and my Saviour. I give God all the glory. Amen!” 

(…to be continued…)

Read part 1 here

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My name is H.O. Ojewale. I was born in 17th March, 1955, in the then Gold Coast, now Ghana, Greater Accra. My parents are Nigerians. I am married with three wonderful children.


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